With five kids so far, I don't feel like we have a big family. My mother has four, my mother-in-law has five, and I know a number of people with 8, 9, or 10 kids. So the fact that we all fit in a standard mini-van convinces me that we are just at the high end of normal. Until, that is, we go out in public. People's leers and comments quickly remind me that, to some people, we are a travelling circus show of cuteness and snot.
This post is called 12 things mom's of big families may want you to know because they didn't hold some big convention and elect me spokesperson. But from speaking with other mom's of many, there are definitely some points that come up again and again.
1) Please don't ask my kids if we're going to have more. We don't consult them!
2)Yes, we know what causes this. No, we don't want to hear your thoughts on family planning.
3)Please don't stop me in the grocery store to tell me how busy I am. I know I'm busy. You know I'm busy. So can I please get out of the cereal aisle before my 2 year old spots the fruity-o's?
4)Having a large litter of children doesn't mean I am particularly patient, or organized, or rich. What I can tell you for sure is that I am far more patient and organized (and slightly less rich) than I was when I started having kids.
5)We don't look down on you for having less kids. You really don't need to preface every comment about how tired/frustrated/stretched to your limit you are with words like "well, I only have 2, but..." I remember having 2 kids....I was exhausted and it was hard. No matter how many kids you have, they require everything you know you can give and then some.
6) Please please PLEASE don't make my children feel like freaks.
7) Don't compare us to the Duggars. (Although from what I can tell, it would be a compliment.) Or some crazy hippy family you once knew with eleven kids who liked to dance naked in the woods or some such oddity. You don't go around comparing families with 2 kids to one another, do you? Of course you don't!
8) I would like to reiterate: Yes, we know what causes this. Every time I leave the house I hear this question AT LEAST 3 times. It stopped being funny a long time ago.
9) People like to say "kids are such a blessing" in one breath and "but you're done, right?" in the next. Don't.
10) Friends: I know you don't have enough chairs to invite us over for dinner. Invite us anyways. Please.
11)For goodness sakes, don't pity me. This is by far the most mind boggling reaction we receive. I am wandering contentedly through the grocery store with 5 healthy happy kids and people tell me that they feel sorry for me? From where I stand, we are pretty stinkin' blessed.
12)Oh, and Yes....we know what causes this. See, it starts to lose it's humour pretty quick, doesn't it?
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